The Pendatang joke from Penang

(This joke, which came by email, hits home a most pertinent message about Malaysian nation-building.)

Ahmad: Hey son, who were you talking to ?
Son: My fairy godmother.

Ahmad: How many times have I told you there is no such thing as a fairy godmother ?
Son: I know but there really is a fairy godmother, Dad.
Ahmad: Okay, call her here now. I would like to talk to her.
Son: But she won’t come Dad. She said she doesn’t want to meet you.

Ahmad: Did she tell you why?
Son: She said that you are a bad man.
You betray your Chinese friends by calling them Pendatangs.
Ahmad: You saw that news on TV, didn’t you ?
Son: No, I didn’t, the fairy godmother told me.
Ahmad: Well, your fairy godmother is wrong.
She should thank me for calling the Chinese Pendatangs.
Son: Why Dad ?
Ahmad: You see son, the Chinese are actually bad people.
They come from another country and they want to chase us out of
this country.
Son: Why do they want to do that Dad?

Ahmad: Because they are greedy.
Now, you tell your fairy godmother that your Dad is right by doing what
he did. Can your fairy godmother grant you wishes ?

Son: Yes Dad, she told me so.
She even asked me to make a wish but I didn’t know what to ask for.
Ahmad: Well, ask your fairy godmother to make all these Pendatangs to
disappear and go back to their grandparents country of origin.
Okay son, time for bed. No more talking to make belief fairy godmothers ,
okay .
Good night son.

Son: Good night Dad.

*15 minutes later*

Ahmad: SON, SON, where are you ? Where are you ?
Huh, there you are. I am so worried, I thought I’d never find you.
Son: Dad, where are we….. India ? Why are we here ?
I was talking to my fairy godmother on your wish and suddenly we are here
in a strange place.
Ahmad: Err, what were you talking to the fairy godmother ?
Son: *I told her, I wish all the Pendatangs would be sent back to where they
come from*.
*Is that Tun Dr Mahathir s/o Iskandar Kutty and
**Uncle Samy there selling roti ????
Dad, is this India ??? Badawi in China ….
Najib in Acheh rebuilding the home…..
**Khir Toyo busy tending his farm in Indonesia ….
Syed Albar and the rest of Arab SYED’s clan riding his camel in Yemen ‘s
Arab desert.*

*** Indonesia population increases by 18 million while Malaysia population* shrink back to 10 million in 15 minutes !!!

Those descendants with more than 3 generation remained in Malaysia .

180 years….. 6 generations : Tun Tan Cheng Lock’s descendants.

  1. #1 by sheriff singh on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 11:59 am

    Hey!?! Where am I? Why am I in the Punjab?

  2. #2 by kcregister on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 12:11 pm

    I think the actual word is penumpang.

  3. #3 by xaviermz on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 12:12 pm

    It does not matter now where we were from. Yes, our past is valuable to us but let’s keep that to ourself and cherish it under the name of our nation. As long as we are proud Bangsa Malaysia, we contribute as a fellow Malaysians to our future. It is our outlooks that matters the most.

    Chinese, Malay, Indian, etc are nothing but just ethnic identities. When we speak about our country and do anything with Its name, we call ourselves Malaysians. Is that too much to ask? Multiracial countries other than Malaysia exist in this world, including our nextdoor neighbours. But they call themselves by their country. Can we?

  4. #4 by monsterball on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 12:14 pm

    hahahahahaha…..This is a good one.
    Susan Loone have one on English…..real funny.
    Shieh said…”My kids speak “England” better than me”

  5. #5 by Raitman on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 12:19 pm

    What about Hee Yit Foong?

    I can’t find her in China or Malaysia either.


  6. #6 by taiking on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 12:34 pm

    Outcome: Malaysia a country with loads of Tans.

  7. #7 by alikim on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 1:31 pm

    Hee? very lucky to be in Malaysia, but in one of the Jelapang ponds.

  8. #8 by Loh on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 1:59 pm

    Ahmad has finally found his home with TDM, in India. Wonder if they still love Malaysia. They will soon be applying to come to Malaysia, to sell NEP.

  9. #9 by sightseeing on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 2:20 pm

    //What about Hee Yit Foong? I can’t find her in China or Malaysia either.// Raitman

    Someone saw her in Jelapang last week but disappeared as soon as she was being recognized. The name for Jelapang in Chinese is “[Chew Tong] which means [ nine holes] She must be hiding in one of the holes.

  10. #10 by Toyol on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 2:45 pm

    America was also colonized by ‘pendatangs’, now they call themselves Americans and proud of it. Why can’t we call ourselves Malaysians? Reason is simple.

    By calling ourselves Malaysians would imply that we are all equal and have equal rights under God. Special privileges to the majority would have to be withdrawn. Do you still think we can be called Malaysians, ever? Some groups will never allow it!!!

  11. #11 by boh-liao on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 3:17 pm

    Toyo to Toyol: U ini bodoh. U can call yourself Malaysian. I want to be called Malay in order to become Umnoputra and enjoy NEP. Cepat kaya raya!

  12. #12 by taiking on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 4:35 pm

    (ring) (ring) Maxis international roaming. (ring) (ring)
    (pick up handphone): “Hello. Siapa tu?” Ahmad asked.
    “Oi, sini mana” caller asked and enquired further:
    “Oi Mat, Toyol sini. I kat mana?”
    “Tak tahu” Ahmad said and added:
    “Oh err you see. Anak saya. Err. saya suruh er.. katanya dia ternampak fairy. Jadi I pun terus suruh dia minta wish. Err.. Buat wish semua pendatang malaysia di hilangkan ke tempat asal mereka.”
    “You @#%$#@&*^, son-of-%$&^@!”.
    “But I dont want to go back to Indon &*(^%).”

  13. #13 by undergrad2 on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 4:42 pm

    Why are we today in the Garden of Eden?

  14. #14 by taiking on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 4:51 pm

    10 years later:….

    CNN Asia Newsflash.

    “China’s construction giant headed by Mr. Taikong was recently awarded multi billion dollar super highway project in malaysia.”

    Meanwhile …

    Malaysian Immigration officer Ah Tan is staring at a foreign worker application form. The first information of the form reads:

    “Nama permohon: Ahmad Toyo.”

  15. #15 by wanderer on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 4:52 pm

    In Australia the whites call themselves the 2nd Australian. At least they are not that thick skinned!

  16. #16 by undergrad2 on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 5:06 pm

    This is no time for jokes. All this talk about who deserves to be where is a distraction from the real problems the country is facing. The domestic economy is facing a threat like it never faces before since the country became independent.

    Instead we have blogs like this one, making fun of the issue of race at the expense of the urgent public interest issues which cry out for our attention. This serves only to distract our attention from the real problems. If the opposition is to make a dent in the short time that it is in control of some of these states, it cannot sit on its behind but instead run in order to stand still with the many economic problems facing the country.

    This is no time for jokes!

  17. #17 by Evenmind on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 6:35 pm

    People like ahmad belongs to the professional MORON club of Malaaysia, if there is none , then he should be sent to Tanjung Rambutan , there he can fantasize the Chinese going back to China, or best still sent him back to the black hole where he belongs, celaka punya orang taada akai.

  18. #18 by smalluncle on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 6:38 pm

    Wonder how many of the MPs and Mentri / Pengarah of GLC from UMNO are TRUE MALAY.

    by the way, who are the TRUE MALAYS? The Sungei, Kadazan, Dusun, Dayak?

  19. #19 by shannee on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 7:23 pm

    When singer Guy Sebastian famous, the major newspaper headline \MALAYSIAN-BORN Singer now based in australia…..blah..blah..blah…

    but if he is not a singer and not famous … he will be called \pendatang\!

  20. #20 by Yee Siew Wah on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 7:57 pm

    Good article LKS. You see, some of those political bums in UMNO who used to claim themselves as malays or bumiputras or whatever, they are actually the real “pendatang” in this country. In order to further prove their claims, most of them resort to racial and religious tatics trying to portray themselves as malay savours. But let there be no doubt, the actual malays are real good people.

  21. #21 by jedyoong on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 8:00 pm

    Good one!
    No one left in Malaysia?

  22. #22 by storm62 on Wednesday, 11 March 2009 - 11:07 pm

    good on you YB Lim, these jokers will definitely make my day.

    a joke a day will keep the toyol away!!!

  23. #23 by daryl on Thursday, 12 March 2009 - 1:35 am

    This is how it goes:
    The Parliament Opposition make fun of the comments made by the Government politicians. Meanwhile, The BN politicians is making a mockery out of Rakyat desire for change.
    Guess what the judiciary and PDRM is sitting on the sideline laughing their butts off while spending rakyat’s money and at the same time torturing rakyat as well.

  24. #24 by grace on Thursday, 12 March 2009 - 12:06 pm

    I remember the police were investigating this guy for sedition. Until today, no news. Ha! How efficient the ppolice are!!

  25. #25 by blablowbla on Thursday, 12 March 2009 - 2:58 pm

    by the time,Malaysia only left with orang asli,Bong Mokhtar was then the PM,he declares 100% bumi equity!
    Anyway,it is meaningless becos nobody is investing in malaysia,everywhere are beggars……………..

  26. #26 by yeeyuket on Friday, 13 March 2009 - 8:41 am

    Sabah has again received peanuts from Second Stimulus Package initiated by Federal Government despite play a King-maker role in last general election. The attitude and mindset of Central Government towards Sabah never change. It’s another wake-up call for BN Sabah MP to seriously consider abandoning continuous suppport for BN government in the interest of the State and the people in general. If they don’t change, i call on the people to change them in next election.

  27. #27 by yeeyuket on Friday, 13 March 2009 - 8:47 am

    “Deputy Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak favours a return to the original New Economic Policy vision of improving conditions for the poor of all ethnic groups and not only Malays. Najib, who is about to take over the leadership of the country, said the pro-Malay policy of the NEP had successfully raised living standards for the majority population”.

    This is a lip service. Don’t trust BN. If Malays simply cannot accept English as a medium of teaching. They will not accept NEP for all.

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